You're the Only One Page 9

  “Yes, girl, I saw them. I’m surprised you even came home with me.”

  TJ scoffed. “Please. He’s gonna have to work harder than that if he wants some of this.” She waved her hand over her body, and I smiled. “And what about you, Miss Polyamorist? Look at you, playing the field and shit. That man was sexy as fuck by the way. He could definitely give Logan a run for his money.”

  “I know, right?”

  “So, are you going to see him again?”

  I shrugged. I liked Rajae, but I didn’t think I’d be calling him. I felt like my life was complicated enough, and honestly, I didn’t think it would be right, dragging him into it. It had been fun, enjoying the freedom of my polyamorous relationship for the night, but I didn’t think I was ready to go any further.

  I must have zoned out for too long because TJ had already moved on and was playing Super Mario Galaxy on the Wii U. I pulled my phone out of my purse and realized I’d missed a text from Logan. He’d sent it two hours before.

  Logan: I miss you.

  I grinned and texted him back.

  Sky: What are you doing?

  I grew more paranoid with every passing minute that he didn’t respond. I should consider the fact that Logan might be asleep, but my mind was too busy with imagining other things he could be doing.

  He finally answered five long minutes later.

  Logan: Sleeping.

  Sky: Are you alone in bed?

  Logan: Yes. Everything okay?

  Sky: Perfectly fine. Great actually.

  I should’ve known better than to drunk text, but apparently, I didn’t.

  Logan: You sure?

  Sky: What did you do tonight? Were you getting busy with someone else? Is she hot? Does she have blonde hair?

  Logan: You’re drunk, aren’t you?

  Sky: That’s not the point. Stop avoiding my questions.

  Logan: I’ll come see you tomorrow and answer any questions you have.

  Sky: No. Now. I need to ask you now when you aren’t here with your big arms and green eyes.

  Logan: LOL. Okay. I wasn’t getting busy with anyone else tonight. I had some new equipment to set up at the gym. Can we talk more tomorrow? I have to be up early.

  Sky: Fine.

  I tossed my phone onto the couch and pouted. I wasn’t sure why I was pouting, but I felt like doing it, so I did.

  “Move your ass, Mario! Damn you!” TJ shouted at the TV.

  I wish Dillon was here. I needed my best friend.

  The next morning, I woke up with a massive hangover and a cloud of regret hovering over me.

  Why did I text Logan?

  Everyone knew drunk texting was never a good idea. I liked Logan a lot, but I was beginning to wonder if this whole situation was going to drive me insane. I couldn’t spend every waking moment wondering where he was and whom he was with. This wasn’t me. I rarely got jealous. I didn’t understand how Logan’s open honesty made me less secure in our relationship. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

  Groaning, I made my way to the kitchen for coffee when I noticed TJ was asleep on the couch with the Wii controller still in her hand.

  “TJ, wake up. It’s Friday. You need to go to work.”

  Her eyebrows furrowed, and she frowned. “Ugh, no. Please, just five more minutes.”

  “It’s almost eight thirty, T. You don’t have five minutes.”

  As soon as she heard the time, her back popped up from the couch, and her bloodshot eyes opened wide. “Shit! Shit! Shit!” She dropped the controller and ran to the bathroom.

  “I’ll make some coffee!” I shouted and instantly regretted it.

  I rubbed my temples and decided to have a glass of water before doing anything else. As I finished swallowing the last gulp from my glass, there was a knock at our front door.

  “What the—”

  When I swung the door open, my breath caught in my throat. Logan was standing on the other side.

  Oh God.

  “Logan, what are you—”

  Logan took a step closer, his body pressing against mine, and I was suddenly very aware of my bad breath and disheveled clothes and hair. Peering up at him, I smiled weakly, too scared to talk and send a cloud of morning breath toward his nose.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, tucking strands of my hair behind my ear.

  I stared at his chest and nodded. “My breath stinks. I just woke up,” I mumbled toward his hard pecs.

  Logan chuckled and wrapped his big arms around me. “Let’s get you some coffee.”

  He walked all the way into the kitchen with his arms around me, forcing me to walk backward in front of him. I laughed as he pressed my back against the counter and started preparing a pot of coffee around me.

  “Why don’t you let me go, so I can brush my teeth?”

  “Not yet,” he muttered, glancing down at me between scooping coffee grinds. “I want to say something first.”

  I was surprised at how easily he was finding his way around our kitchen. The coffeemaker was beside our sink, so he didn’t have to move away from me to finish what he was doing. I stood there, staring at his profile, as he focused on his task. He was almost too pretty.

  Once he filled the coffeemaker with water, Logan took a step back and held my hands in his.

  He waited for me to meet his gaze before he said, “No one else makes me feel the way you do, Sky. No one. I understand that this is new to you, and I’m sure you’ve got questions and apprehensions about all of it, but I want to make sure you never question that. I’m in this because I want to be with you. I really, really like you. You’re sexy. You’re funny. You’re smart. And you’re different from anyone else I’ve ever been with. When we make love—”

  I felt the blood rush to my cheeks, and I bit my lip. I always laughed when people called it making love. It sounded so cheesy.

  “What?”

  I shook my head. “Nothing. Continue.”

  “When we have sex…” he continued, raising an eyebrow to see if I approved.

  I nodded.

  “I feel a real connection, and I think you do, too.”

  I nodded again. I’d definitely felt something, but that might’ve been all the orgasms.

  “I know you have to get ready for work, and I have a few meetings this afternoon, but I want to see you tonight. Can I?”

  I nodded again. I was beginning to feel like a bobblehead.

  “Good. We can talk more then.” He moved in closer to hug me. “The coffee is ready.”

  “Okay.”

  Logan held my upper arms and looked down at me with a gentle smile. “You’re gorgeous.”

  Then, he leaned down and kissed me, despite my morning breath. His tongue pressed into my mouth and slid against mine once before he bit my bottom lip and sucked it into his mouth. I stood there in shock, unable to fight him off.

  He grinned down at me and smacked my ass. “Have a good day, babe.”

  I didn’t move as he walked out the front door and closed it behind him.

  “Was someone here?” TJ asked, rushing into the kitchen, dressed in a pencil skirt and blouse.

  “Yeah, I think so.”

  Her eyes narrowed on me before she fixed herself a to-go cup of coffee. “Okay. Well, I need to go. I’m late. Thanks for making the coffee.”

  TJ rushed out the door, and I stood there for a minute before muttering, “You’re welcome.”

  DILLON

  I walked into The Phoenix with my guitar on my back and a weight on my shoulders that I’d never felt before. This was it—my big chance. There was no guarantee that anything would come from this night, but I had a feeling it might be my best shot at making my dream a reality. I needed to make it count, leave my heart bleeding out on that stage. At least then, I’d have no regrets.

  The club was full, a buzz of sexuality and excitement coursing through the air. Unlike the usual dance-club atmosphere, The Phoenix felt more intimate, like a jazz club. Tables covered the main floor
where people sat and drank together, mingling and flirting, as rhythmic music played from the speakers around the room. Taller tables lined the walls for those who wanted to stand and make their rounds. The bar tops were lit up with red lights, its warm glow illuminating everyone around it. This place was intoxicating…and intimidating.

  As I made my way toward the side of the stage, I saw Matteo, TJ, Logan, and Sky standing around a tall table covered in drinks. When Sky saw me, she ran in my direction with Matteo not far behind. My eyes raked over her body as she approached. She was wearing a low-cut top and tight skirt that hugged her curves.

  Damn.

  The sight of her stole the breath from my lungs.

  “D! Oh my God, you look so good!” Sky shouted over the music and chatter as she looked me over.

  I quickly lifted my eyes to meet hers.

  Why the hell am I checking out my best friend? Why is my heart beating so fast?

  “Thanks. You look good, too.”

  A surprised smile lit up her face. “Thanks, D.”

  I wanted to touch her. Instead, I moved my hand and gripped the guitar strap draped over my shoulder. Sky and I stood there, staring at each other, unspoken words hanging in the space between us, until Matteo caught up with her.

  “Are you ready, man? Tonight’s the big night,” Matteo said while he clapped his hand down on my shoulder, snapping me out of my daze.

  I nodded, but his attention was quickly diverted as a woman in a short red dress walked by.

  “You’re going to do great! I can’t wait to see the look on everyone’s faces when they hear you up there.” Sky smiled so brightly at me that I couldn’t help but smile back.

  She’d always been my biggest cheerleader, and I wanted so badly to prove her right and make her proud.

  “Thanks, Sky.”

  I leaned down to kiss her cheek and felt her stiffen at the touch of my lips. I’d never done that before, and honestly, I couldn’t say why I had done it then. It just felt right.

  When I straightened my back, Logan came to stand beside her, but Sky’s blue eyes stayed on me. I was beginning to regret putting him on the list.

  “Congrats on getting this gig, man. This is awesome.” He put his arm around Sky’s waist.

  I guessed even polyamorists got jealous.

  “Thanks.”

  Sky blinked and glanced at Logan before turning back to me. “Where’s Natasha?”

  I shrugged. “She said she’d be here, but she’s running late. A work thing.”

  We started making our way toward their table, and when we got there, Matteo handed me a beer. I took a big swig before placing it next to the rest of the glasses.

  “You go on in ten. Do you want me to go backstage with you?” Sky asked, her eyes studying me, looking for any sign of nerves.

  I shook my head. “No, I’m good.”

  It was probably better if she didn’t. I wasn’t sure what had come over me, but I needed to put some distance between us until I figured it out. I couldn’t afford to be distracted by it now. I had to stay focused.

  Luckily, I’d already come in earlier that evening to talk to the band and go over my set. It was rare that I had such an experienced band behind me, so I was grateful they hadn’t needed much coaching. The Phoenix was known for its live music and love for talented musicians.

  Taking one last sip from my beer, I straightened my back and glanced toward the stairs leading behind the stage.

  I took in a slow breath and urged myself to stay calm. “Well, I guess this is it. Wish me luck.”

  “Good luck, Dillon,” Matteo said, raising his glass and taking a sip. “Knock ’em dead.”

  “Good luck, dude!” TJ shouted from behind Sky.

  Sky took a step closer and waved her hand for me to lean down. When I did, she said in my ear, “Show them how good you are, D. Do it for Maurice.”

  Then, she kissed me on the cheek.

  I peered into Sky’s devoted blue eyes. “I will.”

  When I got backstage, I took my guitar out of its case and cleared my throat. I hummed and warmed up my voice, my eyes closing as I tried to relax.

  “Do it for Maurice.”

  An image of my big brother smiling and laughing flashed in my mind. He had always loved my voice and told me I should be a singer, even before I thought I wanted to. If Maurice were out there somewhere, watching, I’d bet he was smiling that same smile. Opening my eyes, I squared my shoulders while that thought filled me with confidence. I’d do it for him.

  Ten minutes later, I was walking out onstage after being announced by the DJ. My heart was beating a mile a minute, and my armpits and back were already covered in sweat, but I was ready. I smiled and held up my hand to acknowledge the applause of the crowd.

  I couldn’t see much past the bright lights, but I could hear Sky shout, “We love you, D!” at the top of her lungs.

  I stepped up to the microphone and took in a deep breath.

  Here we go.

  Holding my guitar, I started to strum the familiar rhythm of Michael Jackson’s song “Dirty Diana” but slower. As I sang the first verse and people began to recognize it, I heard a few claps and whistles in the crowd. I closed my eyes, my lips touching the microphone, as I let go of the fear and let the music take over. By the time I reached the chorus, the band joined in, and all my nerves were gone. The crowd started singing along with me. I opened my eyes and grinned against the microphone while I sang and flawlessly hit the falsetto notes. Sometimes, I even surprised myself. People clapped and whistled, their energy only pushing me further into my trance.

  Once I finished the song, I dropped my head and took a step away from the microphone as the entire crowd erupted into applause. People were smiling at each other and getting out of their seats, the buzz in the room rising with each passing second. I lifted my head and smiled, astounded by their enthusiasm.

  There was no other feeling like this.

  The rest of the set went by in a blur of rhythm and words. I had gone somewhere inside myself, where nothing existed but music and love. It was the most exquisite feeling. It was ecstasy. It was freedom.

  Sometime during the show, I’d taken off my jacket, and my skin was coated in sweat. I had one song left. A group had gathered at the front of the stage, and I made eye contact with some of them as they screamed and reached up to touch my hand. Reaching out, I made contact, unable to fathom why they’d want to touch me. It was all so surreal.

  “Thank you,” I muttered into the microphone. “This next song is called ‘Forever Forgotten.’”

  I glanced to my left and found Sky’s eyes. She was beaming at me with so much pride, it made my heart ache in my chest. I’d written this song when I was eighteen, and Sky was the first person to hear it. I’d felt safe sharing it with her because I knew she’d relate to the lyrics.

  The drummer started in with the beat, and I took myself there—to the dark place in my heart that carried the memory of my father and the empty years he’d left behind.

  “You once told me you loved me.

  Love don’t hurt like this.

  Said you were sorry.

  But sorry don’t mean shit.

  Take back those years. Drown in my tears.

  Leave again or stay. We’ll be left with nothin’ anyway.

  ’Cause you live in memories,

  Tryin’ to erase the pain

  And the lies that you told.”

  The crowd had grown quiet, and I closed my eyes, playing my guitar, while the anger and hurt continued to build inside me with every drumbeat.

  “But you know what you are?

  You’re forever,

  Forever forgotten.

  You’re forever,

  Forever forgotten.

  Every time I think I’ve moved on,

  I remember you’re gone.

  Just another bastard son living by the gun.

  Do you even know what you’ve done?

  Take back those years. Drown
in my tears.

  Leave again or stay. We’ll be left with nothin’ anyway.

  You left with nothin’ anyway.

  You left us with nothin’ anyway.

  You never gave me nothin’ anyway.”

  I dug deep in my soul, singing my heart out on that stage, and the room grew still, everything fading away as I held the last note. My eyebrows furrowed and I pushed my breath out for as long as I could, feeling the stinging of tears I never shed.

  “’Cause you live in my memories,

  Trying to erase the pain

  And the lies that you told.

  But you know what we are?

  You’re forever,

  Forever forgotten.

  You’re forever…

  And I’m forgotten.”

  As soon as the music stopped, my chest heaved with my labored breaths, and I took a step away from the microphone. An instant later, someone clapped, and I opened my eyes. The applause quickly spread across the room, and everyone began to stand from their seats. I breathed a sigh of relief and smiled as the crowd grew louder. Sky stood on someone’s seat in the midst of my first standing ovation and put her fingers between her lips to whistle.

  Tears pricked the back of my eyes, and I fought hard to keep my emotions in check.

  This was what my dreams were made of.

  When my set was over, I walked backstage, and Sky was diving into my arms. I hugged her tight and spun her around. She squealed, and I laughed, both of us delirious with joy and adrenaline. When I set her back down on her feet, our eyes locked, and I had the sudden urge to kiss her. Not on her cheek, but on her lips. I thought she sensed it. Her smile slowly faded as our eyes searched each other, our breaths drawing short, but neither of us moved. A second later, Matteo came to stand beside us, and the moment was gone.

  “You fucking killed it, brother! Oou-wee! Do you hear them out there? You fucking did it!”

  Breaking my gaze from Sky’s, I smiled at Matteo and was quickly swept back up into the excitement of the night.

  “Thanks, man.” I hugged him and smacked him on the back a few times.